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Fraser stars as a neurotic cartoonist, who, after a car crash leaves
him in a coma, finds himself stuck in the purgatory-like Dark Town,
with Death (Goldberg) hot on his trail. Only his alter ego, the
obnoxious Monkey Bone, can help him return to the world of the living.
Kattan will play O.D. Stu, an organ transplant donor who is drawn into
the mutated world of Dark Town.
Fox is talking to Bridget Fonda to co-star in the film, but no deal
has been reached.
``Monkey Bone'' is expected to go before the cameras in May, with
Henry Selick directing from a script by Sam Hamm.
According to the Hollywood Reporter, Bridget Fonda is in final
negotiations to take the part of Fraser's girlfriend, Jane. In a
change from previous descriptions of the film's story, HR reports that
I am a member of the production team of Monkeybone. We had a cast
reading of the script last week which went great. It should be
hilarious!!! Thought you'd be interested in a partial cast list.
Brendan Fraser
Bridget Fonda
Whoopi Goldberg as Death
Chris Kattan as an organ donor gymnast come back to life
Bob Odenkirk as his surgeon
Giancarlo Esposito as the God of Nightmares, Hypnos
Mary Pierce (from Babe, Pig in the City) as Lulu LaRue, a coma victim
Christopher Franciosa (Tony's son) as The Grim Reaper
Paul Rubens (aka PeeWee Herman) as the voice of Monkeybone
The place where The Cartoonist goes when he is in a coma is renamed
"Downtown", perhaps because of the racial connotation of "Darktown".
Other than that, I had almost no idea what to expect from the script,
and I ended up enjoying myself immensely. MONKEY BONE reads like a
filthy version of ROGER RABBIT for the first third, a very surreal
combination of HEAVEN CAN WAIT and BEETLEJUICE for the middle section,
and THE MASK if the script had been as funny as the star for the last
act. I know it sounds a little schizophrenic, and in some ways it is.
Doesn't matter much, though. Scripter Sam Hamm has crafted a
remarkable funhouse that Henry Selick was born to bring to life. This
is a very visual piece of work, and I can imagine some of the
extraordinary sights and sounds we're in for. There's all sorts of fun
material about where nightmares come from and the nature of death and
there's some grim gallows humor about Fraser's character and his coma.
Overall, I think this film could be made into an astounding spring
hit. Given a few weeks to find an audience, and granted that Selick
takes this blueprint to the next level, this may be one of the first
wicked thrill rides of the next millennium.
Selick also commented on using Paul Reubens as the voice of the title
character saying, "I tried a lot of cartoon voices and listened to all
sorts of people. But Paul's voice is like Miles Davis' trumpet. One of
a kind. It's really a unique instrument."
Megan Mullally (Will & Grace) has joined the still growing cat of
Henry Selick's Monkeybone, according to Variety. The trade also
reports that the live-action/stop-motion animated film is currently in
production.
Well, it all began a mere two days ago. I received a panicky plea from
Sam Hamm... He's the fella that wrote BATMAN (only partly the one
you've seen, the original masterpiece of a script was ripped to shreds
by scoundrels that felt like tampering with perfection... cie la vie)
Months ago, I had agreed to do a little cameo in Henry Selick's latest
film... currently known as MONKEY BONE.
Well... Sam, you see, has been my contact, keeping me in the loop as
to when I'd be needed for shooting. Originally, I was to be one of the
'Nightmare Generators', but.. my pleasant nature doesn't lend itself
to such a stretch. Afterall... I'm not an actor, just a fat guy who
can type mediocrly.
Sam, says basically, "HARRY PLEASE CONTACT ME ASAP! THEY ARE FILMING
YOUR PART... TOMORROW! (Yes, I did say TOMORROW!)" Well, the one
particular advantage to living the life of a slacker (albeit a
curiously busy one), I can pick up and leave at a moment's notice...
when the need arrives.
So I contact Sam, and the process of getting me to LA, begins. Now...
This is weird because, just that very day, Robogeek had arrived to
check out what was going on with MYSTERY MEN again, and now I'm headed
out there. So, I alert Senior Moriarty to my arrival, and everything
is set.
Now, you may ask me... "HARRY, Why do you accept these cameos?"
To be honest. It's because I'm a geek. I mean, this film is being
directed by Henry Selick. Henry "NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS/JAMES AND
THE GIANT PEACH" Selick. One of the most cool fellas on the planet.
I'd be in a film with Minotaurs, Centaurs, Medusas, Grim Reapers,
Animated Monkeys, Harpies, Cyclops, Anthropormorphic Feline
Waitresses... Can't you see... That's cool. In my own pathetic sense
of self-coolness, I would exist on a plane of existence that would
include them! Not only that, but Stephen King is going to do a cameo
in the film as well. How could I say no?
"Well, you could assume the mantle of being a fair and impartial
reporter that doesn't allow himself to be put in a situation where it
appears he has been comprimised."
True, I could do that. But then I wouldn't be in a movie with
Minotaurs, Centaurs, Cyclops, Harpies, etc! And when I'm 50, I want to
be able to look back and say, "I was in a movie with Minotaurs,
Centaurs, Cyclops and Harpies!" It's just one of them childhood dreams
that I am duty bound to fulfill!
Now, unfortunately... My primary dream was to provide a voice for one
of the supernatural characters in the film. No appearing on camera,
but... Apparently I help fill a frame, thus saving on production
costs... so they wanted me in live-action.
Alright, so I guess right about now you are wondering.... What is this
MONKEY BONE about? Who does it star? Is it going to be cool?
Here we go...
I don't want to spoil the wonderful twists and turns of this film, so
I'll just give a brief overview of the film.
This, FOX ANIMATION/1492, production is the most live-action project
that Selick has ventured into yet. And, in alot of ways, it's quite
possible one of the most mixed media films produced. There will be all
manners of beasties and coolities brought to life from Stop-motion to
CGI to costumes to... well just run through the list.
The movie is about a cartoonist named Stu, played by Brendan Fraser,
who has created the next... 'In' character. Monkey Bone. An excitable
raunchy naughty monkey that thinks about sex and doing what makes
himself feel great. Stu is on the verge... nay... He's already there.
Think of Matt Groening or Mike Judge. His creation has passed over
into the mainstream and now... Well, now he's ready for success. He
has a beautiful fiance, played by Bridget Fonda, and his television
show is set to debut. The merchandising of his character is...
burgeoning.
But.. the hand of fate will have none of that. As sometimes happens, a
tragic accident occurs throwing Stu into a coma, which sends him to
the strange netherworld of DARK TOWN. You see... When you go into a
coma, you arrive in DARK TOWN, the place where monsters reside, and
the folks in a coma sit and drink at a bar till it's time to return to
their bodies, or take the escalator to Death's domain.
Naturally, Stu has to return to his body, and come out of his coma...
or does he? Soon as we get to Dark Town, the movie enters the domain
of Henry Selick. This isn't really kiddie friendly. It's dark
(natch-really) and very bizarre. Of course it's exactly the sort of
warped universe I ate up as a kid. And I only hope and pray that a
large line of TOYS will accompany this, Selick's latest trip.
Ok... Now that you have an idea of the basic story, settings and
universe that the film exists in... I'll go into my story and
experience on set.
When I arrive at the airport, I'm instantly greeted by the PA (I
believe Tony was his name, but I'm terrible at names, so instead...
I'll refer to him as... The 4X4 Beachcomber... it's a reference to our
journey back to the Airport today) He's standing there with this
really groovy MONKEY BONE sign, that instantly caught my eye. BTW... I
wanted the sign, but everytime I grabbed at it, he wouldn't let go,
dagnamit!
We hop into his his red pickup and jaunty off for the hotel. You see,
my calltime was at about 11pm, and this was an ALL-NIGHT shoot, thanks
to Sam Hamm and his inconsiderate... "I like movies to be dark"
nature!
So, here I am at the Universal Sheraton, and... as much as I want to
go hop over to UNIVERSAL and try out that T2-3D ride... I have to hook
up with Moriarty and visit CREATURE FEATURE and GOLDEN APPLE... no
trip to L.A. would be complete without that! So... the old man shows
up at the hotel with Salma Stalker, and we head off to this sandwich
shop... somewhere called, Santiarrios (I am positive I screwed that
up!)
At CREATURE FEATURE, my brain goes into OVERLOAD, and I mess up being
able to buy anything simply because... There are too many options. I
really wanted this TALOS model... but try as I might, they wouldn't
sell it. Curses!
So it's off to Golden Apple, where I pick up the new McFarlane Toys of
DAWN (for my sister) and that coolest of cool Sin City toy. Ahhhh....
Leaving there, we head to Moriarty Labs, where I meet the various
henchmen and learn of Robogeek's indiscretions which commenced during
his stay in Los Angeles.
I do the couple of postings that I did yesterday, and then head with
Salma Stalker back to my hotel. Once there, I fall into a slumber...
Dreaming of stop-motion animated creatures walking around me.
When the phone rings, my concious side awakes... talks to the angelic
voice of "Ellen" and then I fall back into my deep pit of
unconciousness.
Finally, the annointed time arrives and a call alerts me that 'my
driver' is here.
Alright, now this driver ain't no ordinary human being. His name is
Chico. And...
Do you remember BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA? Remember Egg Shen? Chico
is the mexican-american version of Egg Shen. Which basically means....
He's one of the coolest entities I have ever had the good fortune to
meet. He's in his late sixties. And remember the pentameter with which
Egg Shen spoke? Well that's how he spoke. He went into stories of
driving Matlock for 7 years all over the country. He talked of the
time he drove to Texas, and saw the sign with the woman built like "a
brick shithouse waving and saying, 'Welcome to Texas, enjoy your
stay!' and then... about twenty miles down the road was this sign that
put the fear of god into me, it said 'Don't Mess With Texas!' and then
had all these rules you had to follow. And from that point on, I was
afraid, cause they don't take no shit in Texas!"
Then as we drove on the 101, Chico looked out his window and said,
"This is where I was raised... right here out your win...dow. A great
deal has changed since then. Right here, right where we are driving I
used to ride my bicycle down the center of the dirt road that laid
here. There were houses on either side and the people were happy. Yes,
they were happy. There was no troubles or miseries... And then the
highways came and the neighborhood was cut in two. And now... now
there is no dancing in the streets and many are miserable souls."
Chico rules! I'm serious... out of all the memories that I will take
home from this trip, it is Chico and his magic van that I'll take with
me. At any moment I expected some sort of hell-demon to attack us, and
Chico to repell him with a thrown acorn of power. It felt as though
adventure was on the cusp of pushing through to our world. Yes...
Chico is the man.
I left the hospitality of Chico's van and shook his hand... the arc of
electricity confirmed that Chico was not of this earth. Goody.
I turn to see 'The Crew'. You can tell instantly when you see 'The
Crew'. They all have tell tale signs of duty. That one over there was
a grip and that one too. Those are hair and makeup... Over there was a
costume person... The food people, the lighting people, the set
photographer... and the one... completely uninvolved person on the
set. That had to be the screenwriter Sam Hamm.
He comes a triapsing through the front yard like the dynamic writer he
is. How to describe Sam... Well, to me, he looks like the sort of guy
that would have a Cocker Spaniel who's hair would be going a tinge of
white. I don't know if that gets what I'm saying to YOU across, but it
perfectly communicates my impression of the man.
As we shook hands a charge went through me. That hand typed half of
the best darn script experience I ever had. God I love his original
draft of BATMAN.
"Why do you read scripts Harry?"
Well... Quite frankly, because I read Sam Hamm's BATMAN... and
discovered that it was approximately 15 times better than the movie.
Because it painted a movie in my mind that was, definatively... the
best superhero movie I have ever seen, heard or experienced.
I say this, and I have said it before, that his BATMAN script and the
resulting movie, propelled me to think... Maybe the scripts are better
than the resulting movies.
Now, that isn't always the case, but everynow and again it is true.
Will 13 DAYS be as great as the script was? Well, it could be... it
just depends on whether or not the process doesn't screw it up. Or...
here's another angle on it. Did you just pick up HANNIBAL to read?
Well, that represents Thomas Harris' picture of the future movie
HANNIBAL. And boy is it a dark and treacherous place. But... ya
know... I read Thomas Harris' novel 'SILENCE OF THE LAMBS', Ted
Tally's script (a couple of drafts) and saw the final film. All three
gave a wonderful piece of enjoyment. Ted Tally's script was fantastic,
as a work unto itself. It was a joy, and it was not the final film. As
for the film? It was a joy unlike the previous two experiences.
Scripts are 'works' unto themselves. It is a hidden medium of
literature that unfortunately doesn't see the light of day for those
across the country that wish to read them. I have often felt that
Studios should publish the scripts, and market them. Develop a
readership for them. Hell, put them out before the film... Release the
first draft, write a disclaimer at the front that describes briefly
how the final work will change, but how this is the work of the
screenwriter in it's purest form.
Currently, it's my favorite medium of writing to read. It's like a
play. Do you read plays? I used to, before I read scripts... and let
me tell ya, it's a joy. A novel paints the entire universe of the
story for you. It tells you of the sediment floating in the air. It
lays bare the inner most thoughts of the characters. It describes the
smell of sweat and tequila in the west Texas bar in hot as hell
heatwave.
But in a script... it doesn't do this. It might very well be...
INT. WEST TEXAS BAR - DAY
And it is then reliant on my brain to paint it. To put the floaties in
the air, the beads of sweat upon the many brows, the raspy sounds of
Johnny Cash bellowing out of the yonder Juke Box. And I have to do
that quickly, lest I lose myself by Bogarting the moment.
So, that is why... when I met Sam Hamm... It was an honor. I've read
his scripts for BATMAN, BATMAN II, MONKEY BONE and the magnificient
tome he wrote for Terry Gilliam called... THE WATCHMEN. Yes... that's
the reference.
Sam took me on the tour of the set. The backyard, the mangled car, the
garage missing shingles and boards on the roof, so that if you stand
on the inside... and the haze of Los Angeles was gone, you could make
out the twinkling of a... well... technically because of the lights
given off by this town, and that floating glowing balloon... you
might, by squinting be able to see VENUS or even our own moon. He
takes me into the house, the domain of Stu... And as I try to navigate
through the house with my large piece of luggage wrapped round my
neck, I try to stay out of the way, and to not knock over any lights.
I'm introduced to... 'the 1492 guy', to an AD, to a couple of other
producers... and finally.. there, right behind the cameras... standing
upright, and focused on something out the window (the reflection was
such that I couldn't make it out) was.... Henry Selick.
Now, I am painfully aware of how 'kissassy' this piece is gonna look
in regards to Sam Hamm and Henry Selick... but.. There are very few
people on this planet that I respect like Sam Hamm... And Henry Selick
is the actualized version of who I most wanted to be when I was a kid.
But here, here was the man that moved Jack Skellington, who directed
Sandy Claws, and directed my favorite movie of the Nineties... "THE
NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS" He's someone who understands MAGIC. And
this set. This set was his next movie. My god, I can't believe I'm
here.
If that sounds 'fanboyish' it is. But that's my honest to goodness
reaction. Now...
How did everything look?
Well, to be honest. It looked like a movie shooting at a house
somewhere in Los Angeles. There was nothing particularly remarkable
about the set, but rather... it was the normal side of the coin, of
which there is an amazingly cool flipside.
However, before I got too acquanted with the goings ons about me... I
was whisked away to my trailer, where I would begin the costuming
phase.
Alright, so I'm walking to my trailer when Brendan leaps out of his
trailer to attack me with a bear hug. This throws me a bit, but we do
a little bit of small talk, cause I'm in a hurry to do the whole
costume thing.
Wow, my own trailer, or technically half a trailer. It has a tv, a vcr
and a cd player. There's a lot of Sam Adams beer in the fridge (best
to stay away Harry, my mind thought), a shower, a toilet with a foot
pedal like that old organ of my mother's. There's a closet... and...
that's about it.
So, I'm sitting in the trailer... looking into the tri-fold mirror and
looking away just before the stress factors of the mirror give way and
it breaks... when
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!
I say, "Come In!"
And in walks this really adorable lady. She's carrying a filthy shirt
that says "LUCKY" and then she says, "Show me your boxers!"
Ok... Now this is where Harry had to exhibit an abnormal amount of
self-control. I had just been staring in the mirror and was quite
aware that I still looked like Harry, so I was relatively sure that
this wasn't a prelude to a fantasy, except... she was holding a big
shirt for me that said "Lucky". Perhaps this was one of them destiny
things...
But before I could unzip and get the show on the road, she blushes and
says giggling "Henry wants to shoot you in your boxers."
Now my instant thought was... "DAMN!" but then the next thought was,
"How did Henry Selick know I wear boxers and not bikini underwear?" I
reach in my bag and pull out my boxers. She looks at them and says,
"What boxers are you wearing now?"
SHUT UP BRAIN!
As I begin to unbutton my shirt she... LEAVES. "One does not gaze on
the Gorgon and expect to live to tell of it!"
So, there I am. Dressed in tan boxers and a LUCKY shirt that looks as
if I sweated for 7 years without ever changing my shirt. (Remind self
to try this experiment) I decide to put on my levi shorts lest my
gorgon snakes out, and venture forth from my trailer to find...
Absolutely nobody awaiting me. Dejected, I return to the trailer. I
have decided, trailers are boring. I have a VCR... but I don't have a
tape. I have a TV, but no cable. I have a CD player, but no CDs. So I
decide to play with the foot pedal on the toilet. That's fun.
After what seemed like an hour, this pasttime began to bore... No no..
it's true... even a toilet footpedal can grow old if you do too much.
Though the blue water did remind me of the Disney PECOS BILL short.
I decide to explore. Walk the neighborhood, when Costume Lady (I wish
I could retain names, I really do) approaches me. She takes me to
'Hair and Makeup' and in there, I see Brendan having his 'look'
applied, and me... well I sit in my chair and let Make-Up Dude go to
work on his biggest canvas yet.
Quickly, I'm done. This will be a far away shot, I'm told. So, I move
down to Brendan's level of the make-up trailer, and wait for HAIR. We
begin talking about all sorts of things. He has a series of
illustrated books like "THE BIG BOOK OF LOSERS" and I forget the other
one, but it was one of those "THE BIG BOOK OF..." books. I bought the
killer ones for my sister in the same series. So we talk about those,
and then talk about the neighborhood kids. You see, this isn't the
best area of L.A., but because of his GEORGE OF THE JUNGLE and the
recent THE MUMMY, Brendan has a significant kid following. And when
he's not shooting, he's hanging out with the kids from the
neighborhood and talking with them. They're eager to see DUDLEY
DOO-RIGHT, which I know is screening in L.A. tomorrow. So I tell
Brenden that they are testing DUDLEY with an "Under 15 and over 35"
audience. He responds, "Ahhh, parents and kids."
We chat about something that's coming up for me, that is a secret
right now... I'll tell ya when I can, and then about Ian McKellen
playing Magneto. That's something he's excited to see. We then talk
about the misery of Press Junkets. Something that I haven't really
experienced at its horrific peak.
In all, we talked about general topics for about an hour. And in that
time I got the feeling that here was a very well adjusted fella. A
good guy. After a bit he took off, and Costume Lady said my shirt
needed to be dirtier, so I had to go get in my Hawaiin shirt again.
Henry apparently liked my Hawaiian shirt alot, so I'm supposed to wear
it to my second day of shooting this coming Monday.
So, I hang out in my trailer some more. Ya know, I thought you could
get tired of the toilet pedal, but really... You can't.
Time passes, and the angelic Ellen comes to whisk me to witness
something that Henry wants me to see. Cool.
So I hop in the van, and head up to set. Upon arrival, I'm told to
head in the backyard. They had one of them huge inflatable landing
pads for hitting when you jump from way up high. Cool, a STUNT!
Alright, I've always wanted to see some dude be insane and leap off
the side of a perfectly stable structure. Though this was a rather
modest leap, a mere 3 stories and, the guy could probably do the leap
with minimal shin damage without the bag... In Hong Kong, this stunt
would be done without the bag. So, I take in what's happening. I see 2
Panavision Cameras, one for close-up, the other for the long shot.
The stuntman is dressed like some bizarre superhero, and to tell the
truth, I have no idea where this takes place in the script. This must
be the product of a new draft. I ask Sam, "What's going on, where does
this fit in?" Sam just looked at me and smiled as he said, "You'll
see..."
The Bastard. Aaargh.
The first leap did really really great, on the monitor the plastic
apron-wearing gas-mask donning Monkey Bone toy carrying weirdo started
flapping his arms in midleap as if he were attempting to fly. It came
out.... wonderful. BUT Henry Selick felt the jump was too far out, he
wanted the fella to jump and look like he was landing closer to the
house. So they set it up again... and all was well.
They had to continue with the shot sequence, so they shot a landing,
the climbing up the side of the house, the running about the
backyard... You know.. The standard insanity stuff.
Then at about 4am I had to ascend to the third floor of the next door
neighbor's house and film my scene. This strange looking apron dude
has just done something in the backyard I'm told. I, being the
concerned and nosey neighbor that I am, turn on the lights, rush to
the window, and peer out at the madness below with a look of agitation
upon my brow.
Now, they only bring in the most amazingly trained actors for such
sequences. I had to, react to a light being turned on, then rush to a
window, pull back the curtain, look out and show a look of agitation.
That's a tough and complicated thing to do. Also, I had to focus only
upon the strange apron dude in the backyard and not the camera crew or
the 1492 dude or the floating glowing orb. Nope... this would require
some of that zen buddha focusing of my spirit. I sat in the room
cross-legged and in mid-levitation whilst I got centered and found my
center.
When I was emotionally prepared and after soaking my left pinky in 102
degree water (it's necessary folks, it's not eccentric), I was ready
for the shot.
We shot it a couple of times... and... I was done. It was time to
return to the hotel, and fall into the realm of slumber.
I'm told that I will shoot my next scene this coming Monday, and it
will require the operation of a garden hose. I tell ya, you wouldn't
see them asking these so-called professional actors to do this sort of
thing. Instead they call me... cause I can operate technical thingees
and emote all at the same time. That just ain't your common run of the
mill cameo work. I'm gonna have to look like I'm naturally watering
stuff, and then I'll have to look like I'm emotionally believing that
I'm wanting to water this stuff, and that I'm not aware of being on
camera. Tough, I know. But that's why they called me in for this. They
have faith in my... Talent!
Sigh... Hopefully I'll get a glimpse at some of the 'other' cool
things going on with MONKEY BONE... like the city or some of the
monster designs. I'm really curious about this stuff. It's what I'm
dying to see. I've got my fingers crossed.
Alright, set the way back machine for Monday, June 14, 1999.
(Diddly doo Diddly doo Diddly doo)
{The Screen Goes Wiggly}
[Then Straightens Out]
I'm still a happy boy from the knowledge that I'm gonna be in a movie
with Minotaurs, Centaurs, Medusas, Grim Reapers, Animated Monkeys,
Harpies, Cyclops, Anthropormorphic Feline Waitresses. I can't believe
my luck, but my first day on set really kinda depressed me in a way.
Where were the Minotaurs, Centaurs, Medusas, Grim Reapers, Animated
Monkeys, Harpies, Cyclops, Anthropormorphic Feline Waitresses? I
thought they'd be walking around the set and stuff. You see... I have
never shot this type of movie before, and I figured it was probably
gonna be like Roger Rabbit, and the various creatures would be sitting
in director's chairs smoking cigars and getting hot babes to wander
into their trailers. You know... The way it really is.
I had been told that my scenes take place in our reality, but that
when they actually begin shooting in Dark Town that all those
monstrous actors would be walking around and being cool as can be. BUT
I DON'T GET TO BE IN THOSE SCENES.... (kicking can around my room)
So I just sat there pouting and sucking my thumb. Oh sure... I was in
a scene with Brendan Fraser. But... He's not a Minotaurs, Centaurs,
Medusas, Grim Reapers, Animated Monkeys, Harpies, Cyclops,
Anthropormorphic Feline Waitresses. So on this day as Chico was
driving me to set I was a bit more solemn than my first trip. Oh
sure... Chico was still the single coolest entity on the planet, but
from experience... I wasn't going to be seeing any Minotaurs,
Centaurs, Medusas, Grim Reapers, Animated Monkeys, Harpies, Cyclops,
Anthropormorphic Feline Waitresses. Once on set I went to my trailer
and waited for costuming. This time, I had brought a couple of CDs
(NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS and JAMES AND THE GIANT PEACH) to put me
in the state of mind... Prepare me and my character for the universe I
was traversing into.
"I am becoming a Henry Selick character. I will become Mr Snyder. I am
no longer Harry Knowles. I am becoming a Henry Selick character. I
will become Mr Snyder. I am no longer Harry Knowles. I am becoming a
Henry Selick character. I will become Mr Snyder. I am no longer Harry
Knowles."
The PAs allowed me to go into this tantric state of conciousness where
I was perging my existence and laying in a new character. Mr Snyder.
In my state I saw my entire character arc from birth. From my third
floor bedroom in Los Angeles I rule the world with my Garden Hose. I
spray and give life-inducing water to the earth... creating a cycle of
events that begins each morning right here. Below that spot that I
water is a flaming Titan that I must extinguish each and every
morning. He begins as a flick of flame and if I'm late... He could
ignite the entire Earth and storm his way across the rainbow bridge to
Asgard. But me... and my garden hose keep him in check.
However, the reason you won't see my heroic character and his epic
quest is because of Sam Hamm and his decision to focus on my loopy
neighbor Stu. If he had only the vision to understand the phenomenal
importance of my character to the very existence of the earth
itself.... The constant battle to suppress the powerful forces lurking
just below the gentle daffodils below my window. Sigh. If only Sam had
had the vision to see.
So instead of lining up on my side of the fence and witnessing the
awesome spectacle... They would be focused on some reanimated corpse
breaking and entering into stupid ol Stu's house. Sure Chris Kattan's
character is going to notice me up in my window, sure he's gonna try
to reassure me that it's perfectly normal that a dead man with duct
taped guts in a red jogging suit breaking into my neighbor's house
is... OK. But really... What do I care? I'm saving the world on my
side of the fence. He's performing a tiny taters crime.
Now some of you may wonder why my character waters from the third
floor. Some may assume that it's because I'm fat and lazy. You have
limited thought capacities. If I were down there... On the lawn, the
evil demons beneath my grass might consume me with fire. But I'm
smarter than they are. You'll see. I don't catch on fire.
Today was a daytime shoot. And my call time was at pre-dawn. Whew.
I met Dave Foley, he seemed pretty cool. Chris Kattan was very cool...
but then... he had duct tape around his abdomen and his stomach was
split open with a wonderful view of viscera beneath. Very cool.
Henry was in a gleeful mood, and the shirt he had them adorn me with
said simply.... STIFF. (For the joke to be revealed, read what my last
shirt said in the previous report, linked at the top of the page)
He was completely delighted by the joke. Actually... so was I. After
all, if any two words describe me, LUCKY STIFF, are probably more apt
than any I can think of.
For my part of the act... it was surprisingly difficult. I had to walk
up to the window and begin spraying back and forth down upon my
garden, the whole time whilst watching Kattan's actions.
Ok... Now I know that ëSOUNDS' easy, but it really wasn't. There was a
stunt required of me. You see. I'm REALLY fat. And the window is
REALLY small. I had to smoothly fit into the window frame smashing one
arm into my belly and window just below the word on my shirt and not
have a pained look upon my face. Best supporting actor material folks.
Year 2001 Oscars... You'll see me, and I'll thank all the people below
in Talk Back that post with the heading, ìHARRY is the Greatest
Supporting Actor In History!!!î Note... It must read exactly that, and
your name will be thanked by me when I accept my Best Supporting Actor
Oscar in 2001.
As you would expect from a professional with my talent, it didn't take
many takes to get my awesome talent upon screen... However, I was told
they'd be shooting with Kattan for the rest of the day. Sad isn't it?
Sigh.
So as I left the set and returned to my trailer I was told that Sam
Hamm was en route from San Francisco to abduct me for some sort of
private hell of his. Joy. So I sat in my trailer and awaited Sam the
man.
Minutes drifted into an hour which turned into several. Seems Sam,
either slept late or the plane had problems. Yeah... uh huh... Tick
tock tick tock.
I was going over in my head all the curse words I could string
together to describe the finest qualities of Mr Hamm's... when
suddenly as if by magic he arrived.
Now Sam has this studious look upon his face as if he's trying to
multiply 111,111,111 by 111,111,111. I kept saying
12,345,678,987,654,321 and he kept telling me to stay quiet. Finally,
he figured out the ignition on his car and we were off for parts
unknown.
As we were speeding along one of Los Angeles' many freeways, Sam would
spontaneously turn his turn signal on and stay in the same lane. He
did this about a dozen times in both directions. But when he did get
over he used no signal. He said that this was his way of keeping the
world on it's toes. He scares me.
Finally we screeched to a halt outside this really big thingee... you
know... a place where they shoot interiors? Ummmm.... Something like
Aural Performance Halls, I believe that is what Sam called it.
Well, as I walked with him up to the security guard posting, I swear
the guy was reaching for his gun. Sam scares people man... Not me, I
know him, but this security guy was scared. It was as if I was walking
with a clown or something.
We had to walk on up to the production office, where Sam had to
spontaneously create genius dialogue on the spot for some scene or
another coming up soon. Shockingly... he did. Then they paid him with
three suitcases with an undetermined amounts of bills inside. Sam just
wanted to know if the money was clean... whatever that means.
Anyway, Sam was tired of me already... as is often the case when
people meet me, and he hustled me to this other building.
Now, Sam was slapping me every now and then, but he said he had to
make it look good for the studio. I didn't see any cameras, but... I
went along with the beatings. Finally we got inside and... I almost
started to cry.
Little statues of the various Minotaurs, Centaurs, Medusas, Grim
Reapers, Animated Monkeys, Harpies, Cyclops, Anthropormorphic Feline
Waitresses!!!! I was soooo excited. I mean, Holy COOL!
The best way to describe the look of the characters is for you to
imagine the designs on the old 1800 and turn of the century carnival
posters advertising Freaks and Oddities. The depiction of say... DEVIL
MAN on the painted canopy would be the literal translation of Devil
Man, instead of just some schmuck with horns glued on his head. This
stuff was VERY VERY cool looking.
I was set to begin flexing my pinky finger to trigger my Hat-Cam, when
Sam ripped it off my head and destroyed it.
ìHarry, there's no way I can let you take pictures of this stuff,
THEY'D kill me.î
This arose a great deal of paranoia. If a studio would be willing to
kill a screenwriter... then... Well, I should be safe, they've been
killing screenwriters for years and noone has really complained but
Screenwriters... And the studio can always re-write anything they say.
Next, Sam took me on a tour of the soundstages.
The first few were gigantic lumber mills filled with endo-skeletons of
things that are not yet realized. It's very strange as he points to
crisscrosses of timber and says, ìThat's gonna be Death's Office!î
And I'd turn my head sideways and go, ìUh huh, I see itî
My nose was filled with the intoxicating scent of sawdust. I love
snorting sawdust. Makes ya feel like you're building something. Doing
some labor.
Then we finally went to ìTHE BIG STAGEî where a GIGANTIC set of DARK
TOWN was nearly complete.
My mouth dropped to the floor. My God this place was cool. Imagine a
boardwalk gone insane. No.... INSANE, I tell you.
What is the general terrain of a Boardwalk? Flat, right? Heh... Not
here. The boardwalk was warped and askewed. Peaks and valleys. Forced
perspectives of boards getting smaller then Bigger. Very very
disconcerting. The idea that this will probably be torn apart just
fills me with sorrow. Somewhere this should be preserved. Like... Ya
know I have a really big lot in back of my house. And a big jogging
track in front of it. This really belongs in one of those two places.
Alright... Here we go. The visual centerpiece for me was this Ferris
wheel. The center part of the Ferris wheel that stabalized it was a
giant elephant with perhaps 9 trunks extending from it's nose. Each
trunk held a thingamabob that you get in. And the trunks rotate as the
wheel turns and it is sooooo cool looking. There were tons of
buildings and theaters and hot dog stands... BUT ALL WEIRD. All
nightmarish, but these nightmares is the world that us strange and
unusual people of the world adore and dream of.
I bet you if Tim Burton visited this set, he'd sit in the middle of it
all and begin ripping the arms off of Barbie dolls while singing a
happy tune about divorce. In otherwords... it'd be his heaven.
THEN... another set was this Bar. In this Bar all the comatose folks
sit and await their fate. This is the Bar with the Minotaur bartender
and the anthropormorphic feline waitress played by Rose McGowan
(WOWZERS). The bar is in the center and is in the round. The interior
of this place is... Well... how do I describe it?
The effects work is going to be a gigantic mixture of stop-motion, CG,
puppetry, drawn animation and make-up... and oh yeah... animatronics.
By now I'm sure they have some of these type of scenes done and man...
I'd love a glimpse. I bet it is simply wondrous. Man, I hope this
collage of effects processes mesh together as perfectly as they want
it to. I'm pulling for em. It's an ambitious and strange project.
It's not a safe film, and Fox really should be commended for
attempting to bring something as vervy as this to the screen. It's not
aimed directly at kids by no means. This is aimed higher than that,
but I can't imagine kids not being entranced.
All the joking about Sam Hamm aside, he really is one of the nicest
guys I've met in this industry. Over the years he's been treated a bit
like a welcome mat, and he's grinned (and frowned) and bared it. And a
project like this is the reward you get by sticking to it. By
continuing to just hammer away. Eventually, you're allowed to get the
right breaks. I just hope the pieces fall perfectly together.
Proof of Sam's genius was in giving me no dialogue. Ya see... he
recognizes that I'm from the Chaplin and Keaton school of brilliant
acting. Words destract from my emoting. heh.
After the tour I had to get from DarkTown to the L.A. Intl Airport
inside of 30 minutes. Somehow... by a miracle... it all came together.
I'm expecting some cool pics from set soon... till then... this is
all.
Oh yeah, from the current issue of TOTAL FILM, comes this picture.
That's Kattan in the red, and Fraser in the black. They are fighting
each other from the giant Monkey Bone balloon.
Kattan Swings For 'Monkey'
By Chris Petrikin
Excerpt from Daily Variety Online
4/6/99
HOLLYWOOD (Variety) - ``Saturday Night Live'' star Chris Kattan is set
to join Brendan Fraser and Whoopi Goldberg in ''Monkey Bone,'' a Fox
film employing a combination of live action and stop-motion animation.
"Monkey Bone" Casting
Excerpt from Cinescape Online
Two more actors have joined the cast of Fox Animation Studios'
live-action/stop-motion action comedy Monkey Bone, starring Brendan
Fraser and Whoopie Goldberg.
Fonda's character takes notice that upon Fraser's return from his
coma, that he is possessed by the spirit of his character, the titular
Monkey Bone. Meanwhile, Fraser's soul remains in a coma induced nether
world called Dark Town where his character battles Death (Goldberg)
even as Jane attempts to bring her boyfriend back from Death's door.
ROSE MCGOWAN finds "Bone" to pick
Daily Variety Online
Rose McGowan's joined the cast of Fox's "Monkey Bone," the film
scripted by Sam Hamm and directed by Henry Selick. She'll play Kitty,
a character who's half woman, half cat, joining Brendan Fraser and
Whoopi Goldberg. McGowan was last seen in the black comedy
"Jawbreaker," "Scream" and "The Doom Generation," and will soon
be seen in "Southie." She's repped by UTA and Hoffman-Polone.
Foley cuts to 'Monkey Bone' as Fraser's foil
The Hollywood Reporter Online
6/3/99
Dave Foley has joined the cast of Fox Animation Studios'
live-action/stop-motion action picture "Monkey Bone" opposite Brendan
Fraser. The project marks the third time Foley and Fraser have worked
together. They appeared in New Line Cinema's "Blast From the Past" and
"Kids in the Hall: Brain Candy," in which Fraser had an unbilled cameo
as a placebo patient in the feature that starred Foley's comedic alma
mater, sketch troupe the Kids in the Hall. In "Bone," Foley will play
a hapless agent whose sole client is a neurotic cartoonist (Fraser)
with an animated TV show who goes into a coma after a car crash.
Though he appears to recover, the artist has actually been possessed
by the spirit of one of his obnoxious cartoon characters, Monkey Bone.
Monkey Bone Report
Cinescape Online
An anonymous source checked in claiming to be a part of the Monkey
Bone production team with some info on what's going on with that
project. Monkey Bone (or "Monkeybone" as our source calls it) is
Nightmare Before Christmas and James and the Giant Peach director
Henry Selick's next film which tells the combined
live-action/stop-motion animated story of a cartoonist (Brendan
Fraser) who falls into a coma after a car accident. His soul turns up
in a surrealistic city where he is pursued by Death, herself, even as
his character Monkey Bone animates his body in the real world. Here's
what else our source reveals:
Ain't It Cool News
Excerpt from June 7, 1999
by Moriarty
I also read MONKEY BONE in
that same sitting. This is the very latest draft of this film, the
seventh, and I wasn't really sure what to expect. I know it was called
DARK TOWN at one point, and that Ben Stiller was attached to star for
a while. I know that visual mastermind Henry Selick is directing the
film now, and that Brendan Fraser ended up with the lead. I know that
Paul Reubens, Whoopi Goldberg, and Chris Kattan are all playing comic
roles. And I know the whole thing was inspired by a comic book I've
never seen or read at all.
Selick Talks Monkeybone
Cinescape Online
Henry Selick, director of Nightmare Before Christmas and James and the
Giant Peach, is currently shooting Monkeybone, his live-action/stop
motion animation film starring Brendan Fraser. While talking to USA
Today, Selick revealed a particular detail of the film saying that
"[t]he key character is Monkeybone, who represents what Brendan's
character fears most - merchandising."
Mullally Joins Monkeybone
Harry's Adventures on the set of Henry Selick's MONKEY BONE!!!
Ain't It Cool News
Friday, June 11, 1999
So... What was I up to out in California? Why was I at Moriarty Labs?
What was the purpose of my journey?
Now... I had never spoken to either of these men, I have had no
dealings with them, they just wanted me to be in this movie. I guess
we bloated redheads are coming into fashion... (tip: Get your head
dyed red and eat extra BEN & JERRY's everyday beginning tonight!)
It's not a large part, I'm just supposed to play Brendan Fraser's next
door neighbor. Someone who dresses sloppily and peeks in on what
others are doing. So... naturally it is a stretch.
Upon closing in on the set, I began to catch glimpse of a floating
glowing orb hovering above a black tarp covered home. I thought, "Is
it a good witch or a bad witch?" And then I wondered about The
Prisoner and if he was alright. I'm not sure how this device works,
but it casts a halo of soft light that illuminates a vast area of
space. I want one of these for the backyard. They'd be nifty. I want
12 of them that I could attach to a hot air ballon, then travel the
world scaring the bejeesus out of the non-technical people of the
world.
And it's a joy to read. The ideas, the promise, the lack of budget
constraints, before the influence of directors and stars. If
director's are allowed to release "director's cuts" then why, pray
tell can writers not release their 'Written Cut" of the film, as can
only be seen on these typed pages.
I wanted to do whatever it was that Ray Harryhausen did. But I never
had a 16mm camera that'd let me go 1 frame at a time. I never could
afford the materials needed (or that I perceived as needing) to create
that magic.) But Henry Selick... He set out in this world to keep Stop
Motion alive as an Art Form and device for storytelling. He was able
to make the first mainstream feature length 100% Stop Motion movie...
a feat I had always figured Phil Tippet was going to do. Instead,
Tippet set out to revolutionlize digital effects by adapting the magic
basic elements of Stop Motion.
I point at the white pinstripe ones. She then tells me to get in the
grey ones, and put on the shirt.
Harry's Continuing Adventures on the set of Henry Selick's MONKEY BONE!!!
Ain't It Cool News
Thursday, September 9, 1999
Hey folks, Harry here. You may remember my report I filed from filming
my cameo in MONKEY BONE (Click Here To Access That Report). Well, it
dawned on me that I have not given you folks the second half of that
report. My second day filming on MONKEY BONE is... as of yet...
unwritten about. Well, let's see how far I get in this... There is a
lot to describe, plus... I'm still waiting on some stills that were
taken on set to arrive. (Yo, Sammy boy! Donde?)
I am tired of Air Travel. In the last 4 days I've been on planes for a
total of 17 hours. Actually... it wasn't that bad. Hell, it was
actually pretty damn cool. Who am I kidding, I'm the luckiest kid in
the world.
I told everyone my motivation for my character, and they would just
stare at me. They didn't understand the importance of my character. I
explained it, and they just did not grasp it. It's sad really.
There is an immediate reaction to the style of the characters. They
are done in a somewhat Cubist styling. For example, when you and I
think of Harpy, we most likely think of the Harpies from JASON AND THE
ARGONAUTS, well... here... the Harpies are these bizarre six titted
flying pig like creatures with furry wings. Their faces are as if they
were squished against a plate of glass, then pulled out in the
strangest of positions. There were characters that had gigantic arms
and tiny bodies and walked upon their knuckles. Medusas? Well, their
snakes were multiple colors and patterns. Not all one color or type of
snake. They rocked.
Ok, you know that flourescent colored stuff you can decorate your
cheesy acquarium with? There's usually sparkles and a pitted texture
to it. And when you turn on the blacklight it screams tacky. The floor
was metal, and the ceiling was a metal grate. And what ya don't know,
is you drive around the bar in a bumpercar, sparks showering from the
ceiling, and you drink away your pitiful comatose existence talking
with monsters from the id. I tell ya. If everything comes together for
this film, this stuff is going to be burned in us geeks' brains
forever.
February 12, 2000... Everyone loves chocolate...which is why if you're going to promote your new animated/live action film Monkeybone, it pays to hand out free chocolate bars with the image of your title character on the wrapper. Of course, in the information age that we live in, after the attendee at the promotional event is done eating his or her treat, you can then take the wrapper of the candy bar, scan it, and then send it off across the world...or in this case, to Coming Attractions.
So, as fate would have it, the world's first look at what the animated Monkeybone character will look like can be seen on this chocolate bar's wrapper No, don't thank us; just another day where we serve you the type of hard hitting, no nonsense journalism that's made us a player in Hollywood. [Eric Lurio got a candy bar. Why didn't we get a candy bar? Hey, Fox -- you listenin'? WHERE'S OUR CANDY BAR?]
February 15, 2000... While covering the New York
City Toy Fair, the Raving Toy Maniac website came
across the merchandising licencees for Fox's
Monkeybone. Being the professionals they are, the
RTM gang snapped 8 high quality shots of some of the film's
action figures, plush dolls
and collectibles. They are definitely
worth a look.
